The Blood Of Womyn

I performed at an event last week to help raise awareness towards human trafficking and although it is often thought of as something that only happens in other countries, it is a huge issue amongst us here in America.  Sacramento in particular is one of the cities in America where it is a huge problem, and so this evening was an important way to raise awareness and to connect the artistry of the voices that speak against this injustice to connect with organizations that are already doing work for those that are getting caught up in these trafficking rings.

Anytime that I am asked to do a piece at these events I am torn between that fact that it is obviously not so much a showcase of our talents, as in other venues such as slam, but more so about using our art as a tool towards achieving an ends.  In this case, raising awareness towards an issue that needs the light to be shined upon.  And these are the kinds of events that keep me honest about what I am doing and why I do it.  I started out writing poetry with a lot of force behind the social justice aspect of it, and how poetry was often a powerful medium to speak out against the problems we see in our communities and how we can inspire others towards change.

This piece that I wrote in 2010 speaks so powerfully to the issues that we face as a society in this day and age.  Human Trafficking is a manifestation ,much like any injustices towards women and children (the list is too big to even begin) of the systems of patriarchy that are in place and the power of men becoming an oppressive and destructive force in this world.  And not because patriarchy is evil in itself, but more in the fact that the balance of masculine and feminine energy has become unbalanced and that in many cases, anything unbalanced is doomed to destruction if it cannot find  a way to right itself.

This piece is my attempt at speaking from the  side of men, and recognizing the imbalance that has been created from the structures of patriarchy running wild.  It is my hope, that the men of our society begin to realize the power that womyn have and the ways in which they are able to offer so much in the way of gift towards healing our society, but how can that happen when they are continuously  viewed as inferior to men? This is an invitation to revision of a world view that is so pervasive and intertwined in our dialogue that it often goes unnoticed.  This cannot happen any longer.  There need to be voices that begin to speak out against this imbalance in order for us to get right again.

My Poem writing Process part 3

Second Draft- Free Write

Sometimes it takes me a while to get back to work on certain pieces. Maybe after reading it once or twice through, I don’t feel the same connection with it as I did before, and sometimes I’ll leave a free-write as it is. In this case, since I am trying something new, I am giving this another chance to take another step with it despite not feelin particularly connected with it right now.
I am going to give it another read and try to see if I can feel the spirit of its words still alive in me, see if that same spring of inspiration might be ready to continue on. So many times, I have to prepare myself mentally to get into the right space in order to work with a piece. I am finding that making sure that the things around me are in order and that my mental, emotional, spiritual self is aligned and ready to work. This usually includes breathing exercises and meditation. As well as focused intention setting. So for this piece, regardless of whether it will become a performance piece, I am still interested in diving into my own reasons for being an artist and what that means to me.

Often times, I find myself writing for the sake of having a piece to produce at the end, or have something new to perform at a salon, or Open mic or slam, and if that becomes too much of a focus, I can lose the heart of what I am trying to do and create, which is to help me reach my own creative potential and artistic expression, not to further myself or ego in any kind of criteria or scale for what is “supposed” to be “good” In those moments, I lose the unique sense of who I am and stray from my original goal of creating art, to express myself as freely as possible. In this way of writing, I can become a force of inspiration, not for others to mimic me in my style or imitate my words and content, but that they in staying true to myself others in turn would feel free to express themselves in whatever way is unique and particular to them.

So having said that, I am using this opportunity to not put any judgment on my free-write and try to make it go somewhere I may not be sure it wants to go, but to still honor it and spend time with it, knowing that it was an honest and pure expression at the moment, and deserves my attention still. So in this round, I am going to do a second draft free write, in this exercise I will be reading the original free-write on a different word document and do a free write from those ideas as they have grown and expanded in my mind: (If you want to read the original free-write again, you can find it here in part 1 of this series:

http://poetjohnpaul.wordpress.com/2011/12/29/my-poem-writing-process-part-1/

————————-Second Draft free write———————-

Someone once asked me what it means for me to be an artist,
Shocked that I didnt have an answer readily available
I went home that night knowing that I had something new to write.
The power to create a recipe for myself, spring together a concotion
of the magic juice that flows when inspiration is ready to strike
Instantly, with the question brimming on my lips, words already began writing themselves
Being an artist for me means
That I am always being sent back in time
To vividly recall the power in which I have been enthralled
In the velocity to soar through galaxies beyond the force of a passionate lover
To feel alive in the touch of uncertianty that forces me to paint in colors unseen
To become known for the masterpieces I have yet to create
Artistry for me is creation unbound by the rules of folklore or form
A frenzied future in relntless passion
Forging into the sun
Steel rings made of boundless inspiration
Untethered in the conventions of value
Artistry is the infinite possibilities that break through
time and space, shattering our assumptions
In ways we have yet to comprehend

For instance,  The plains in the distance
Are still open in their futures, ripe with surprises laying in wait
The swaying of tall green grass in the wind
Covering steps we blaze forward into trails of darkness
being lit by feet igniting words into rich color unmarkable
Searing compassion into canvass
The marks of unbending strokes
Smashing against walls
The words of impact into barriers that collapse beneath their truth
For we are all stories tall
Rooting deep into foundations unlimited
Scraping high into towers of possibilities
Artistry is the courage of expression becoming swords
of bravery ready to cut down the fear that threatens
to suffocate the breathing force inside
Breaking loose the binds that help captive
the coming alive of hands that
form and shift loose color into
canvas that vibrates the echoes of a stirring inside unbridled.
Artistry is the ability to break images into frozen frames of time
that bend endlessly in the waiting of clarity.
Not all of us are patient enough to wait it out.
For in our creation there is destruction
And in destruction there is creation,
Seperated, they are incomplete sides of the same coin,
together they are the true forms of currency waiting to be redeemed.

For there are new words that still need to be spoken into existence
As the parables of old stories float in the ever shifting winds of evolving creatures
Guiding us into lands yet to be explored,
For artistry is found in the courage to move forward into the unknown
in the readiness of alert and subtle memories,
Swimming in dreamscapes ready to be made real
Follow the directions in which hands move
They always show the way
Trusting in the push and pull of expressions that emerge
When the storms of life begin to need weathering
Study the force inside that seeks to be unleashed
Pay attention to the impulse of creation
the stage,
The Canvas
the Mic
The Beat
The Dance
The rhyme
The Lyric
The Stroke
The melody
The pulsating rhythm
of vibrating matter
reverberating through bodies
In the time of eternal creation
listen carefully
Artistry is waiting inside
bold and bravely
Ready to become itself.

——————————End Second draft Free-write———————-

In this go-round, I focused more on making it a conversation.  Something a bit more practical, more easily grasped.  The ideas are still very present, but I shifted the language from telling people something they should know, to speaking to myself about what I want in my own experience.  I am learning to focus more of my poetry on my own story and how that can inform someone as opposed to trying to speak as if I have the answers for someone and they need to listen to me.  I would much rather write as a poet that is trying to figure my own journey and how to navigate, while acknowledging that others have their own journeys and ways they navigate.  From that perspective, I would like to make this piece something more of a personal conversation and reveal a story of my own discoveries and how they have touched me.  As always, the hope of this work is more for it to speak on its own accord, in its own right not as authority, but not as something to be written off without meaningful thought either.  How I will pull that off, we will see….

My Poem Writing Process Part 2

Often, once I am struck with an idea and kind of have a sense of where I want to go with a piece, I begin to let it ruminate in my thoughts, do word associations, writing exercises, more free-write to see if any thing else needs to come out and be said.  One of my favorite things to do for inspiration is to look to my mentors for guidance.  My love for poetry began long before I began writing, and there are so many poets that have left powerful imprints on my evolution as a writer and artist.  Searching in the annals of my memory and remembering any references or ideas about the life of an artist one person immediately comes to mind.  One of my favorite poets and teachers is Rainer Maria Rilke.  In his third letter in the book “Letters To A Young Poet” in which he is corresponding to one of his students over a few years span about life and art and poetry, he says this about being an artist.

Works of art are of an infinite solitude, and no means of approach is so useless as criticism. Only love can touch and hold them and be fair to them. Always trust yourself and your own feeling, as opposed to argumentation, discussions, or introductions of that sort; if it turns out that you are wrong, then the natural growth of your inner life will eventually guide you to other insights. Allow your judgments their own silent, undisturbed development, which, like all progress, must come from deep within and cannot be forced or hastened. Everything is gestation and then birthing. To let each impression and each embryo of a feeling come to completion, entirely in itself, in the dark, in the unsayable, the unconscious, beyond the reach of one’s own understanding, and with deep humility and patience to wait for the hour when a new clarity is born: this alone is what it means to live as an artist: in understanding as in creating.

In this there is no measuring with time, a year doesn’t matter, and ten years are nothing. Being an artist means: not numbering and counting, but ripening like a tree, which doesn’t force its sap, and stands confidently in the storms of spring, not afraid that afterward summer may not come. It does come. But it comes only to those who are patient, who are there as if eternity lay before them, so unconcernedly silent and vast. I learn it every day of my life, learn it with pain I am grateful for: patience is everything!

With this inspiration and guidance in my mind and heart, I let this speak and inform my writing as I take it to another step in its development.

My Poem Writing Process Part 1

Hello Friends!

I am excited for the new year ahead and as usual, this time of year comes with its own reflections and resolutions, I am not usually one of those people, and so I am not saying that I will be writing more in the new year or trying to write one poem a day, every time i try i fall flat on my face and it hurts to have words stamped all over your forehead from hitting the ground.  So that’s not happening.  Nonetheless something is happening these days, and new year or not I am going to follow it for as long as it allows me to.  I have been writing and been inspired lately to get back behind the desk and write with more intention and speak to the new lessons and discoveries I have made for myself and to push forward and create into what I want to become in this new chap book of my life.  (I have a baby on the way if you haven’t already heard!)

So as I go along the process, I figured I would also take this opportunity for those of you that might be interested in what my process as a writer, poet, performance artist or whatever you would like to call it looks like.  In so many ways, the power of an artists work  isn’t only represented in her finished creations, but in the story of how those creations came to become finished.

Tyler Floren Art

I have been blessed in my early stages as an artist with the opportunity to witness and to learn from the story and work of an amazing artist, friend  and most importantly brother, Tyler Floren http://tylerflorenart.com/ (Trust me, you will want to check out his work) His work as an artist has been some of the most influential work in my life, and has informed my work as an artist like no other, in so many ways the images he paints feel like the words that I write, and I have been able to sit with him from the beginning of some of his pieces, and see them grow and evolve, I even got to work on some pieces with him (The one pictured above)  and come to life as the story of his own unfolded.  So many people only come across his work at its final stage when they are hung on walls, but there is such a beautiful gift in being able to see the story come alive and grow with him throughout the time that it stretched to complete the work. And for that I have been eternally grateful.

My Own Process

That was a long segue into saying that I wanted to take that inspiration and this opportunity to share the same with you!  I am working on new pieces and have set intention to begin writing a new series of performance pieces in the next few months.  Tyler and I have some ideas for a future art/poetry opening road show of some sorts, so here is my attempt at beginning that project.  I figure I could perhaps attempt to document my own process and what it looks like for me to write a performance piece from start to finish to share with others as well. I am not really sure where this will take me,  but It seemed like a good place to start something new, begin paving new roads, and to travel out into unknown territory with a sense of resolve for the road ahead. So here goes….

Step one: Free Write

In the past I used to try and have an idea of what I wanted to write about ahead of time, today I am going to start out with nothing in mind and see where that takes me.  Often times I will just free-write without any thing in mind and let my stream of consciousness take over.

I often see this step as a sort of “cleaning house” or as I’ve heard it before “taking out the garbage”, getting words out onto paper and finding a good rhythm with your words and ideas is like stretching before a game, loosening up the joints and getting ready for some real work.  Some times it also ends up being a lot of the work already.  Think about it, the more loose you are, the better you will be able to trust your reflexes and intuition.  In that sense, when I can get my mind to remember that, the free-write can be the best space to get the makings  or beginnings of at least an idea or subject for a piece that needs to come out.  So today, I will start the process with a free write with no edit…..

———–Begin Free Write——————

Always being sent back in time
to remember how much
we are enthralled in the velocity
at which we soar through galaxies
in the force of a passionate lover
alive in the touch of uncertainty
painting in colors unseen
still unknown for the masterpieces
we have yet to create
unbound by the rules of
folklore or form
frenzied in the relentless passion
to forge into the sun
steel rings made of our boundless creations
untethered in conventions or value
we are the infinite possibilities
breaking through
time or space assuming they exist
In ways we have yet to comprehend
or how others thought them to be
For instance, The plains in the distance
still open in their futures
are ripe with surprise laying in wait
Beneath the tall grass
covering steps behind
blazing trails ahead
igniting words into rich color
as compassion sears into our flesh
the marks of our unbending strokes
the impact of words that collapse walls
into crumbling towers made of misunderstanding
for we are all stories tall
building deep into foundations unlimited
scraping high into towers of infinite possibility
that courage our expression
into swords of bravery cutting down
the fear that threatens to suffocate
the breathing force inside
letting loose the binds that hold
captive the coming alive of hands that
form and shift ideas into images and
break images into frozen frames of time
bending endlessly
In our creation there is destruction
In destruction there is creation.
Both, broken sides of a complete coin
waiting to be cashed in for new currency.
There are new words to be written
old stories to be told
broken images to be painted
memories to be reconstructed
dreams to become reality
Follow the direction in which your hands move
they will show you the way
Trust in the push and pull of your expression
when the storms of life begin to weather
study the force inside of you
that beats when the compulsion to create
is lit
The stage,
the canvas,
the mic,
the beat,
the dance,
the lyric,
the melody
The pulsing rhythm
of vibrating matter
reverberating through your body
of life flowing freely through your blood
in the time line of eternal creation
Listen carefully
You are waiting inside
bold and bravely
ready to become
Yourself

—————-End Free Write———————

After reading over it a few times I have begun to get a little bit of a glimpse of what I am trying to say.  There seems to be a huge emphasis on what it feels like for me to be an artist. The ways in which I see myself and how I have been thinking a lot about what it means for me to call myself an artist, and what that calling entails.  I know that there is something inside me that identifies as an artist and I fully believe that I have work to do in order to fulfill that calling, but why?  Where does that come from and what does it mean to me?  Especially when it comes to “making a living” and living in this society how can I fulfill what I believe to be a calling while providing practical needs for me and my family? It is obvious that this has been on my mind and it is directly connected to so many of the important questions already happening in my life.  Perhaps this piece can develop into my own answer to that eternal question, “What does it mean to be An Artist?” Writing for me is an opportunity to create what I want to become, to use words as a manifesto for who I want to be and give myself a prayer to recite everyday on my journey to getting there. So I see this moment as an opportunity to define myself for this new chapter and evolve deeper into becoming myself.

I’ll continue along the process in the next time I step to this poem and work on it. I feel that it will be pretty soon, so don’t worry about being left hanging for part 2! Until then, blessings!

Holiday greetings, new year reflections.

Greetings!

I just returned to Sacramento after 12 days in southern Cali.  It’s so wonderful and fun to be together with my family and friends. Many people I haven’t seen in a long time and friends that remind me of so much about myself when I was younger. It’s also really revealing in the ways we have shifted and evolved in our own personal journeys since. While we reflect back on past memories, dreams come back into sight from the foreground of the foundations in which we have been set. I attribute so much of who I am to my journey as a whole, not only in this lifetime, but also in lifetimes past. And in so many ways, the past that I have created myself in, is somehow connected to the future self that I will create to be. The movement of those that have been connected at one moment, spin off into orbits throughout the universe and still we can come together for split seconds at a time on a ride that reaches depths and heights so amazingly vast and yet so cosmically close some times it can be so much of a head spin in the far reaches of the different parts of ourselves we can touch, and also so grounding when the foundations of those that love so much of who you have already become without them even knowing.

It gives me strength to continue on in the journey, knowing there are so many people in the distances still aware of your orbit, and though I explore with such ferocity on new plains, it is grounding to feel the weight of so many that pull for you in the ways they can, and in ways that others will not. We all have our own orbits to soar through, our own fears to overcome, and so many other battles that we must face alone, but in others, it is nice to come together for a rest, to let down your guard of the places that were once so familiar in our lives.

Reflection for a new year

As the year comes to an end, and the common reflections surrounding the turning of a calendar begin to rise to the surface, and we find ourselves in the midst of siblings, cousins, old friends, aunts,uncles, parents and grandparents give yourself a moment to remember the places that have gotten you here to this point, take time to thank them for all that they have taught you and the ways in which they have given to you. And let that gratitude propel you into the next stage of your life, as you continue to recreate yourself in the forces around you that push and pull to mold you into the movement of who you are and who you are becoming.

Thank You!

Blessings to you all during this holiday season and thank you for your support.  If you are taking your time to read this then to me, you are truly one of those people that have been a part of the trajectory of my life, and have been a blessing and support to me in this journey. For that I am grateful and may this be a moment for me to say thank you for that support.  This new year has a lot of wonderful new things in store and I can feel a surge of inspiration beginning to rise up.  The time to continue working and blazing trails has come upon me once again and am excited to share the new discoveries and adventures that come along with the ride. Blessings to you all and may you have a wonderful new year!

JP